| um super bowl thing today..... yea...i hate footballl.......... yea woo hoo go steelers for my dad so if they win hes happy and i can go to Calavary friday night... but i still hate football.... so while the entire nation sits on the edge of its seat to watch an oblonged ball get throw across a feild. I will be sitting in my room talking to the other kids that hate football too. =)
later
Cam |
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| and
My
God
today sucked too!! fricking crap what is wrong with me!?! i found out for sure that i got a 0/40 on that stupid lab assesment..... and now i guess i didnt make the soccer team cause Ty and Danny both got their calls last night and guess who didnt.
of-fricking-course, Cam.
so yea today just sucked too. and the weekend....? yea it'll probably blow too.
go figure.
Cam
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| well today just BLEW the big one.......
-woke up at 2 AM and got a shower thinking it was 6 AM and well got out saw that it was 2 and cursed Father Time for playing practical jokes on me!........ haha =(
-um i completely failed my lab quiz in PT. how do i know i failed you may ask? Simple. i looked at it up and down like 342349 times and was like WTF IS THIS!?! so i drew a smilie face on it and turned it in.
- and i guess it wont work out with this girl then.....well the girl i was talking about below.... so...... yea maybe its just cause im not cool enough? or.... i think i know! i havent paid Lady Luck in awhile. and shes taking revenge on me.
what is it with me and old fictitious characters? Lady Luck is mad at me, Father Time is playing pranks on me, and Love has deserted me..... pssssh
haha o well...... what do i have to lose now.....?
lattter
Cam |
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| though i will not say who...... who made my life turn around faster than it has ever done before. but she has. and now..... things are about to change. just as the seasons change. things will change. from this cold winter will bring the new life of the year with spring.
oh lord! how great my life is about to become!!!!! =)))
Cam |
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| well guys......... it was good while it lasted......... and now....... its going back down hill... i just cant seem to focus my efforts on any one thing.... not even soccer! SOCCER!!! the thing that has been with me the longest. my oldest friend! its been slowly slipping through my fingers... i think that this 2nd traveling team is what i need to refocus it.... so soon that will be better.
and my parents keep procrastanting getting a dog! they say they miss Renny so much WELL WHY DONT YOU JUST GET ANOTHER DOG! i hate being alone in this house! no one else......... a dog would cheer me up! two if we can!....... stop procrastanting.....
and we got report cards today
93 in HR
80 in Core
77 in Chem
78 in Eng
95 in CAD
and that made me so happy that my Papa wasnt going to lose all the gray matter in his head over my grades!...... but now its all faded and back to the gloom of the week WOOOOOOO HOOOO not......
gah freaking stupid.
and ive been fixing to get the courage to talk to a girl i can like! that will like me!..... but i dont have that courage, never did! i listen to the bands Copeland and Mae and it makes me frickin cry because i wish i could live like that, fall in love again! like the old days........ that were so long ago!........ they arent so far off....... they arent so long gone....... i want a reason, a purpose to live again! a reason to look forward to every weekend to spend with HER, more reason than just YES NO SCHOOL thank God i can sleep in and be at peace with my dreams......
its driving me back from everyone.... i dont talk to everyone like i used to! GOD WHAT IN YOUR NAME IS WRONG WITH ME!?!??!?!?!?!??!?! why is this happening NOW?!?! I WANT IT TO STOP! I DONT LIKE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GRRR im gonna fix this! all of it! bloody hell ill die if i dont! im going to fix up the courage to ask a girl out that likes me FOR ME! im going to tell my parents im getting a dog whether they like it or not! im going to find my reasons for living BY GOD! i am! this is it. this is my solemn swear. this is it. time to start playing the game, living MY life.
time to stand boys,
time to stand up and fight for what you believe in.
even if it is wrong,
fight with all your might,
fight until you win, or it takes your life.
Cam |
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